Curbing the GW Virus? by Viv Forbes
Called the GW Virus (short for Manmade Global Warming Virus), the symptoms are a psychotic fear of the word “carbon”, a compulsion to blame man’s industry for every bad weather event, an urge to weave a warm bias into every weather report and forecast, and a morbid fascination with windmills.
The GW virus was first identified in the British Parliament in 1988 and spread quickly to the vulnerable BBC. It is an airborne virus and was soon spread by junketing politicians to NASA and the UN, thence to an Earth Conference in Rio in 1992, and then to Kyoto in 1997. The infection peaked in Copenhagen in 2009, when thousands of politicians, academics, officials and reporters became feverish.
Cartoon by Paul Zanetti
Because of its isolation, Australia had not developed immunity to this virus, and it quickly took root in the ABC, thoroughly infected many politicians especially the governing ALP/Greens coalition, and then spread via government grant meetings to the CSIRO and every University in the land.
In Australia, incurable cases are sent to an isolation ward called the Climate Commission, headed by chronic MGW sufferer, Tim Flannery. Like vultures perched on a dead tree, these dedicated doomsters see droughts and heat waves in every weather event, even when large areas of the country are suffering floods and unseasonal cold.
The only protection against the GW virus is immunisation with a shot of climate history vaccine. This helps “at risk” alarmists to accept that there is nothing new about fires, floods, droughts, cyclones, heat waves, snow storms or variations in carbon dioxide in the atmosphere.
To curb the further spread of this virulent and destructive virus, infected sufferers must be banned from climate conferences and all infected politicians must be quarantined in their offices.